Autistic people are often seen as having less fulfilling spiritual practices in their faith lives, mainly because the insight on spiritual practices has been dominated by neurotypicals. I have been told to work on expanding my spiritual practices in settings where nobody bothered to ask what my spiritual practices were. Essentially, when autistic people have no voice in how people are taught to relate to God, there is nobody to teach autistic people how to find their spirituality. However, as with all things, autistic people still find God and God still finds us.
The neurotypical church will propose numerous texts on the diverse forms of spirituality. None of these, however, contemplate how neurodivergent people of faith may process. When an autistic person is expected to meditate in silent stillness or hear God in stillness or in between the lines of text, this spiritual experience simply isn’t going to come in the same way neurotypical people expect it to. For this reason, autistic spirituality will be deemed a failure. The issue is that spirituality is about one’s relationship with God. Neurotypicals have rarely made an effort to contemplate their own relationship with autistic people and yet they feel qualified to speak to God’s? Many autistic people will leave the church because it simply isn’t for them, because it was never designed for them. For centuries, neurotypical Christians have engaged in discussion to encourage each other to pursue nurturing paths of faith but autistic people have only ever been expected to fall in line with these paths. We have done an incredible job of finding our own relationships with God but we lack the environment to bounce ideas and experiences off of others who understand how we process the world.
In order to fully embrace autistic spirituality, we must build a community of diverse spiritual practices. For neurotypicals, this means understanding the need to simply believe autistic people and encourage spiritual practices instead of dismissing them. When neurotypical faith leaders influence the spiritual direction and leadership potential of autistic people, their knowledge on spirituality is useless without a knowledge of the autistic community. It is impossible to form an adequate network of spiritual practices when any autistic faith leader is rejected and silenced by neurotypical higher-ups, or worse, forced to pretend the neurotypical spiritual practices are just as nurturing. This only results in autistic people appeasing the church at the expense of their relationship with God. To escape such an abusive relationship with the church, neurotypicals need to either put the effort into understanding autistic people or admit that they don’t control the validity of our spirituality. It is only then that autistic people in faith will be able to fully explore their spiritual disciplines and forge new connections with one another to hone these disciplines.
For this reason, the concept of autistic spirituality must still be explored more deeply. As of now, I can only speak to the ways in which I have connected to God in a way where my brain can more fully work in tune with the movement of the Spirit. While I thrive on routine for daily tasks, I have difficulty finding meaning in repetitive prayer. I connect to God through prayer by organizing my feelings on paper or through movement. Prayer can look like a written prayer or a poem. It can also take the form of a dance or exploring nature. When I’m able to connect with God’s creation, I feel closer to God. While many have spoken about hearing God in silence, silence for me is usually uncomfortable, especially with anxiety that fills my head with stressful thoughts. I rely on the noise to hear God’s voice in my heart. Whether this comes from someone sharing a story with me or a new song or book, the ability to experiences God in motion provides me with a deeper connection than silence ever has. Because my brain processes things visually and kinesthetically, I am able to understand God’s messages in my life through what I see and the actions I take. Above all, I’m able to see God’s image reflected in God’s creation. As we are made in the image of God, each new testimony I witness bears insight into more of who God is. My spirituality has always pushed me to learn more about others, the world around me, and God. By continuing to move and learn and grow, I can nurture my relationship with God in ways that neurotypical spiritual practices have never allowed me to do. I encourage everyone to experiment with different forms of spirituality, understanding that certain disciplines might not be effective in your relationship with God. Always keep learning and growing.
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